February 2025
I am taking notes on things that bring me to reflect. These reflections bring nothing new. These are all things we know already. But sometimes we need to remind ourselves of them, and it feels like new information. These are not just my reflections but also some from people who inspired me throughout February. It takes a village...
February 4th
We are often attracted to individuals who look good with the doing versus individuals attracting with the being.
We should aim for connection rather than attraction. The idea is to have attraction and connection.
You attract the frequency of who you are.
Be the love that you want to receive. Be that energy and you will receive it.
We don't fall in love; we rise in love with the person that we are when we are with that person.
Elle Macpherson, Rich Roll (Feb 3, 2025 episode)
February 6th
Dig into the journey.
The destination is a vacation resort. The journey is the packing, the cab, and the flight.
The destination is a 26.2-mile finish line. The journey is a rigorous marathon build-up.
The destination is reaching home. The journey is leaving work and commuting by bus and train.
The destination is a healed stress fracture. The journey is patience and recovery.
The destination is a peaceful home. The journey is leaving the abusive relationship and rebuilding yourself.
Every minute of our lives is a journey to a destination. We are unconsciously always driven by a destination, forgetting that getting there is the beauty of it all, the essence of life.
February 7th
After writing about this, I was challenged to test my appreciation of the journey when, on Friday afternoon, I missed my train by 5 seconds and initially felt dramatically despaired.
We are naturally programmed to see the downside or to check off our list and get sidetracked from the important piece: being in the now and enjoying the journey. But putting in the daily work will bring inner peace and gratitude.
The more sidetracked we get, the faster time goes.
Inspired by a convo with L.D.
February 14
Kids love traditions.
Had a Valentine's day treasure hunt with Naomie and Glo. They are 20 and 16 years old.
Keeping that tradition going brings connection, reminiscence, and proximity.
It opened the door to a long convo about the past and the journey that got us here today.
Gratitude was the keyword today!
We are never too old...
February 15
The biggest propeller of curiosity is boredom.
And we've eliminated boredom.
Imagine someone standing in line. It is so easy to just pull out the phone and scroll mindlessly.
If you're bored, your brain pushes you to find solutions, which is where curiosity comes from.
Kids create games when bored. They need to be bored to grow into creative beings.
Being bored helps to process things. It brings out solutions and ideas.
We need to get to moments where we have more of that.
Phones are there to stay, but we can learn to put them away sometimes.
And we shall be pleasantly surprised with the outcome.
Inspired by Steve Magness, Guest speaker on the The Rich Roll podcast
...
February 16
You can recreate yourself whenever you want.
...
February 17
We are wired to service but raised to greed.
19 février
Il n'y a rien comme la conscience de la mort pour te donner envie de vivre pleinement.
There is nothing like the awareness of death to make you want to live fully.Dominic Tardif. Épisode avec Karine Vanasse.
This reminds me of a quote that I read in the book that I worked on, written by a participant sharing her experience with breast cancer: " I once read that we have two lives. The second one begins when we realize that we only have one". N.D.
21 février
Social media was flooded with images of the hockey game that ended with a victory against the U.S. It amazes me to see how a threat or a man's toxicity can bring a whole country together.
...
February 26
I was talking with a patient today. She was overwhelmed with anxiety. We discussed that stress is part of life. We can't avoid it. We have to learn not to resist it but to be equipped to cope with it.
February 27
Some thoughts and quotes that stuck with me after listening to Dr Ellen Langer, a psychology Harvard professor. I really enjoy listening to her. She simplifies it all.
Listening to her made me realize that it's ok not to have a bucket list. I want to be happy with what I'm doing today. It's ok to dream and aspire, but a bucket list is not something I aspire to have. I don't need to be bungee jumping off a cliff to feel alive and happy.
"People are led to believe that by criticizing, they are discerning". So true!
"People don't appreciate how hard it is to make things sound simple".
"Negativity spreads as quickly as positivity. And when people talk, people have to understand. Things are not positive. Things are not negative. Things are things. And our understanding of them creates our experience". I dig that!
February 28th
Today's headlines were all about a tensed confrontation between Zelensky and members of the oval office. It brought me to post on socials. This is what I posted:
"I'm not playing cards" Zelensky
We teach our kids that there is zero tolerance for bullying.
It saddens me to see a chosen"leader" doing exactly that in front of the whole world.
This is another example of how his behavior is bringing out solidarity around the globe.
Let's see what the month of March will bring...
March 2025
I heard Psychologist Lisa Damour discuss vulnerability in parents.
The best thing we can do in vulnerable times is to be a steady presence for our kids. We have been around for longer. We can offer perspective that kids cannot have. Being emotional is not the same thing as being fragile. Being emotionally healthy is not just about feeling good. It's about coping when you are not feeling good. you are supposed to feel upset in upsetting situations. Allow distress, knowing you will feel good again.
Talk with a friend
Disconfort fosters growth
How to deal with individuals that lack emotional intelligence.
In difficult situations with a challenging person.: How can I grow from this? At the end of the day, what is your objective? Keep your focus on that.
Of course, learning is easier when we are praised. We will never always be praised. Some will be hard on us no matter how much we try. But we learn about who we are through our reactions, and that contributes to our growth.
Affirm yourself and your needs. allow yourself to grow in the best environment possible. We are all different in our learning processes. Remember, there is a lot of good in people. We just have to learn how to bring it out of them.
Mental health should be at the top of priorities.
Most of what happens in life is out of our control. Resisting only makes it harder.
Promise our kids that hard days shall pass. We can't remove your kid's sadness, but we can be a steady presence for them.
People with addiction need to be in a safe space to talk openly about it. They have so much to lose in the short term and can't grasp how much they can gain in the long term.
When reacting to something that brings out your vulnerable side, keep in mind that your reaction should be well thought. I always repeat to myself: Don't have anything against you. I of course swear and name call in my thoughts when extremely upset. But I keep it to myself.
Having a support system is key. And that takes effort. Checking in on people from time to time. Being there for them. Women are better at it than men. When things go bad for men it worse as their partner is their support network compared to women having family, frineds and colleagues.
May 31st 2025
I haven't written much lately.
I've been in movement, outside, and it feels so good, although there is a constant minor disappointment of not being able to train like I used to.
The human brain, when faced with adversity, is wired to consider a successful healing process when one returns to the pre-adversity state, or "normal". And when it doesn't happen, we resist and generate negative vibes. Why is it so hard to accept what is? To understand that discomfort and adversity fosters growth. If we grow, we are not the same as we used to be.
My life is good. My recent adversity would not be considered adversity for most humans right now. Running is my therapy, and I am accepting that I am evolving as an athlete. I am learning to accept the healing process.
These pics are what May offered.
Are You Mad at Me?
It’s summer.
Kids, well, no longer kids, are home.
Sleeping more.
Eating more.
Scrolling more.
Parents come back from work.
Sometimes to an empty house.
Cleaning more.
Picking up more.
Swearing more.
Has the dog been walked today?
...
Phone goes to voicemail.
A text gets a “Do Not Disturb” reply.
I tap: Disturb anyway.
...
Let’s walk the dog, just in case.
A text comes in:
“Are you mad at me?”
And I wonder.. why does that sentence hold so much weight?
Is a good day simply a day without “mad”?
Is mad the only emotion a parent gets to feel?
We're either mad or not mad.
If I’m defined by two states;
mad or not mad,
then yes, I’m mad
several times a day:
When I see dried toothpaste in the sink I just cleaned.
When I come home to a mountain of dishes.
When I don’t know where you are.
When the silence, the not doing, feels like disrespect.
Like I’m just here to pick up.
Like I’m a monster
for sounding mad,
or not sounding mad
but still being guessed as mad.
What they don’t realize is
Our kids are the only people who can get away with anything.
Because our love for you
is unconditional.
Even when I’m mad.
Let’s go beyond mad.
What is a good day?
A good day holds both good and bad.
It’s reacting to both
in a healthy way.
It’s gratitude.
It’s respect.
It’s knowing that your parent’s love is limitless.
It's knowing that you are safe
to learn,
to grow,
in discomfort.
We’re on the same team.
And sometimes, when I’m mad,
it’s not even about you.
It might be that I’m tired.
Or hormonal (most likely)
Or something happened at work.
Parents have your back.
We want to bring out the best in you.
We’re far from perfect.
Sometimes even clumsy.
But this is certain:
Our love is unconditional.
...
That said
You still have to pick up after yourself.
Early october
For the past few weeks, I’ve been seeing posts on social media from people who wish to run for the municipal elections.
During these few weeks, I’ve taken the liberty of reading the comments.
Comments that would affect me deeply if they were directed at me.
Comments that I wouldn’t want my daughters or loved ones to receive.
Comments meant to express dissatisfaction toward the elected person who is presenting their actions and goals.
These comments are recurrent in many other posts about many other topics.
Comments that could possibly justify a suspension for a student if they had written them to another student at school.
Our children are a reflection of our actions.
So I’m giving us the challenge of being the example for our youth.
Instead of expressing our anger on social media,
I’m convinced we can do better as a community
by attending assemblies,
by supporting the parties we believe in,
by presenting solutions instead of simply opposing.
For our children, the generation that will follow us,
Let’s be the example.
In any topic that has the potential to divide, let’s show the strength of community and of humanity and show them that there is hope for them, for us.
October 13th
I met a really interesting man.
A retired philosophy teacher.
He developed an interest in emotional intelligence. He published on the topic and now gives conferences.
I asked him: Can emotional intelligence be acquired with time for those who have low levels. He started by stating that IQ can not be increased. On the other hand, he said that indeed, emotional intelligence can can be acquired with time but one must be extremely open to learn.
So people have a higher emotional intelligence with lower IQ. Some have a high IQ with low emotional intelligence. Some are balanced with equal of both. But he said that if you only have one of them, those with high emotional do better than those with those with high IQ.
Note to self: I need to attend his next talk!
October 16th
I spent the weekend with friends. We had a long talk about the marathon. We talked about the difference between being new at the distance and then running them with lots of experience. We all remembered at least one marathon where all the wheels fell off. Mine was Burlington. I hit the wall at 16 km.
I have always been fascinated by how men seem to go out harder and accept that they might crash at some point. One runner in particular. He has his podcast and shares his race stories. What I learnt from him is that during a race, when a wheel loosens, it doesn't mean they are all going to fall off. You have to be patient. Sometimes, slow down and see if the moment passes. It often does. That mindset is such a game-changer for me in races.
We often compare running to life. Learning to welcome discomfort.
This weekend, I had a reflection, an impulsive emotion about my relationship with my partner. And sometimes, if not cautious, those thoughts can spiral down a rabbit hole to a point where they get blown out of proportion. The spiralling is more destructive than the situation that triggered it, and we get upset about our thoughts that are out of proportion, thinking the problem is the situation, the relationship, or the other person. And then I think of the marathon, the wheel that loosens, and I slow down. I take down a tall, cold glass of perspective, and then the pace becomes comfortable again.
In a race, there is always the option to quit when the going gets tough. Some say the race begins when the going gets tough. It's up to you to find a way to get through or walk away, hoping for a better day where all the stars are aligned, whether it's a race or anything else on this journey called life.
Another popular saying in our sport is that we can't always control all situations, but we can control our reactions to them. And that goes to real life. We are tested every day. These tests are precious opportunities for us to grow in disconfort!
I had another reflection today on parenting young adults
I previously wrote a poem about my kids.
My eldest started university. She is busy with classes, engineering games and social activities.
She is home late and gone early in the morning.
And I come home to dishes in her room, take out containers, a messy bathroom that I just renovated and a dishwasher that is not always filled or emptied.
I don't like who I am when I call her out on it. I nag. And sometimes I feel that it's all I do.
And I realize today that what makes me upset is maybe less the fact that the house is messy and that I feel disrespected. I'm upset because I wish I didn't have to call her out on it. I wish I could just talk about the cool new chapter that she is on. About the new friends that she met. About the chemistry teacher that she keeps complaining about. I feel that at her age, I wish I didn't have to parent anymore in a nagging way, cause she should just know better.
My kids are great. I'm so lucky to be their mom. Parenting is sometimes about picking your battles and trusting that you are leading them to independence in a caring, sometimes tough-love kind of way!
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